40+ Wacky Ads People Used To Advertise Their Items Online
By Aileen D
Despite how easy top salespeople may make it look, the art of selling is incredibly nuanced. Yes, we called it an art. You need to understand your buyer, do your best to get in their minds, and speak their language (we mean that figuratively, but bonus points if you actually do speak their language)! You have to feed off their deepest desires.
But who knows what these sellers were thinking, or if they were even thinking. Instead of making us want to buy the product, it seems like they were doing a comedy routine. In addition to being unable to sell their products, they sold us on the idea that they should be taken as a joke.
So, if you’re ever in need of cash and decide to sell something, make sure not to follow the example of these crazy adverts.
Perfect for What Occasions?
Minimalists say that if you’re not likely to wear a piece of clothing within the next 45 days, then it might be best to donate or sell it. You can make money off of unused items and free up closet space at the same time.
So, this guy decided to sell his Levis denim shorts. Since they were obviously pre-owned, he thought it best to clarify that he’d only ever worn them once. Based on how they look, we just hope he didn’t show up to someone’s wedding in them!
Welp, There’s That
It’s always nice to be prepared for any life event. These folks had come together expecting the death of Nana, who had been terminally ill. But it seems like the guardian angel was by Nana’s side, and she managed to postpone her death.
The bad news is that these folks have no use for this custom-made coffin now. It might be a little harder to sell than other items on the market, but you know what they say. Death is one of life’s certainties! There’ll always be a market.
Just Needs Some Honey
It’s always essential to have enough food stocked up in the house. Just remember to check the shelf life, or else you’ll regret it like this guy. He forgot he had quality bacon in his freezer, and since he didn’t feel like eating it, he put it up for sale.
For £6? We better have a six-pack of beer and that honey-cured bacon to go. Also, make sure to wrap up that story about why you bought it and decided you didn’t need it. It sounds way juicier than any “old bacon!”
What Friends?
Most people wonder why men don’t live as long as women. After all, they are more athletic, and don’t overthink things like we often do, so shouldn’t they have a healthy lifespan? This next one made us believe that maybe that was their biggest issue — they don’t (over)think.
Wasps in a bag? We can only imagine how this guy managed to stuff a nest in a whole bag without getting stung. But to buy them to play a prank on your friends? That’s a fail-safe way to lose your squad and an even quicker way to shorten your life span!
Popular, Huh
This guy shot to fame after he posted an advert about this particular pizza that was in demand. He claimed that he was only helping a friend sell it and that he was kind enough to sell it to the public for 21 times the original price. How gracious of him!
There were a couple of people who were equally kind enough to take it off his hands, offering to buy it for £10. Those who were less patient quickly called him out on it, saying that there were more than enough of these on the market. What was he thinking?!
She Said It
What is Derby, England, known for? You can take a tour of breweries that make real ale, there’s the Derby Cathedral, which is the second-tallest church tower in England, and you can find fantastic items such as this on sale, in case you’re looking for new furniture.
The woman said it best: you could have that disdainful stain cleaned, but why bother with that process when you can just have it covered with a couple of throw pillows? It won’t, however, cover up the smell of dung reeking from the couch. So, maybe a throw and Febreze! That would be more accurate.
Repurposed Akwarium
Most people who sell things online pass off an item as something else. Nowadays, it’s all about repurposing, kind of like what this seller did. You could store your goldfish in this repurposed refrigerator. Just don’t make the mistake of plugging it in.
Just look at all that space! You could place as many Oscars, Angelfish, and Clown Loaches as you want in there and fill it with Hornworts, Java Ferns, and Money plants for the fish to hide in. Just make sure to keep the door shut, or else…
We’d Like To Report A Crime
Some top salesmen swear by this number-one rule — keep your pitch short and sweet. People don’t care what the item is made of or where you got it from. But if you share information like the kind Nigel Williamson did, chances are, you’ll land in jail.
The guy obviously didn’t think this ad through. And worse, he basically confessed to the theft in a public post where police could trace it. He might have the knack for stealing, but he doesn’t have the brains to stay out of jail.
Just Tried
People who are money-savvy are conscious of the quality of the items they buy. That’s why they will ask things like how long ago it was made, what’s the return/ refund policy, and generally need to know if the product is worth what they are paying for it.
Wanting to put their minds at ease, Nicky told potential buyers that the plate was in excellent condition. Here, you will see her trying it out with what seems to be a mishmash of take-out from the night before. Oh, but that’s not using it, btw!
Dog, Sold Separately
It may be difficult for people to imagine the dimensions of a container, a bin, or in this case, a dog crate. To make things easier for them, Anne Outhwaite enlisted the help of her husband to show everyone just how big a dog this crate could fit.
Dog sold separately, folks. That elicited a couple of heart reactions and a lot of uproar. Most people were concerned that this dog was not being treated properly, so they eagerly offered to buy the dog crate with the dog in it!
When They Give You The Extra
We can’t help but feel for the slow-speaking “Ted.” He is a character from the animated series Postman Pat and is known as Greendale’s handyman. Although he may not be the main character on the show, he has won viewers’ hearts for having the knack to fix anything that comes his way.
We have two issues with this love doll. First, it’s a love doll! That in itself is a dealbreaker for various reasons. Second, that looks nothing like “Ted.” What’s worse is we’re not sure it can fix problems, especially those inside the bedroom, but who’s willing to try it?
Explains the Smell
This woman got a pair of shoes from someone but was confused when she noticed a strange smell. What is going on? She was concerned that she had gotten a used pair but was doubly concerned when she found these freebies inside the package.
There you have it, folks. That is why most gym shoes and heels smell like a pair of onions. Maybe at first, she thought to herself, “is this a new hack in companies and stores?” Pack an onion to preserve the shelf life of those genuine leather shoes!
Choking Back Tears
This next one will either make you laugh out loud or pity this woman. It was a sad moment for Ward Lynn when she decided to put her son up for adoption. As she puts it, she wanted Ashton to go to someone with lots of love to give.
You can tell she was choking back tears as she wrote that product description. Taking the pictures must have also been a tough experience. He was the perfect child — smiled at you all day, and He. Never. Made. A. Mess.
Sound Advice
Whenever you’re selling a product, it’s crucial to have great people skills and radiate positive emotions. The keyword in that sentence is positive. The last thing you want to do is shame a customer for being a size too big for the dress you’re selling.
Welp! Instead of making Ashley Jarett want to buy this dress, she decisively blocked Caroline on Facebook. Well, how about learning to budget, Caroline? That should help you solve your weekly hangout problems. We doubt anyone bought that dress eventually.
Before Netflix
Before Netflix and movie torrents, we had to rely on VCRs and DVDs to rewatch our favorite movies. Each disc would cost roughly the same amount as your Netflix subscription, and these things took up a lot of shelf space.
Mark Ward decided he could place each DVD in a storage album and then sell the DVD cases. It would have been a solid deal if he had sold these in the early 2000s and if those DVD cases were actually useful in some way.
Wanted: Undead
We would call this man courageous if it weren’t for his eccentricity. He was willing to confront a certainty we will all face — death. He had a coffin custom-made for him but sold it a month later, stating he had not had any use for it yet.
Or maybe we had it wrong? Perhaps, this man had really intended to use it for someone else, like Jeffrey Dahmer? But that’s a far-fetched idea. Who would leave behind an incriminating piece of evidence like this in his bedroom?
A Legitimate Problem
People couldn’t help but offer some advice to Facebook user Lord Paul. The guy wanted to sell his 12-month-old Samsung Galaxy phone. But seeing as he did not have a second phone to show its dimensions with, he did this.
It may seem like an oddball of a problem, but it looks pretty legit. How would you be able to show other people the dimensions of your phone if you had to use its camera? It might help to use a mirror next time, sir!
Two Years Too Late
Oh, how we feel for this well-meaning grandpa. He just wanted to make his grandson happy with a cake. In his mind, his grandson would be the same five-year-old he read bedtime stories to. So, that’s the age he carved out for this cake design.
By the time he realized that he wasn’t actually turning five, it was already too late, and the cake was done. Maybe he missed the kid’s previous birthday party, and that’s why he couldn’t tell. Either way, we think this was actually not a terrible ad. Plus, it’s really affordable.
Gotta Be Desperate
You have got to be a little desperate if you buy something as broken as this smart TV. Wayne Tull shrugs it off by saying it only needs a new screen, but that fix shouldn’t cost you more than £20, promise!
The buyers didn’t buy that, of course. As expected, so many people had something to say. If only he had a dollar for every reshare of this post, he would have been able to buy himself a new smart TV! But that won’t do anything for his birdbrain, sadly.
Just Like A Jigsaw Puzzle
This seems like the worst one yet. Luigi Arredondo quickly shot to fame after he posted this oddity for sale. It’s a glass table for $120. The price seems reasonable, but he didn’t take into consideration the buyer’s effort to put it together.
It really shouldn’t be any different from a jigsaw puzzle. Just scatter the pieces on the floor, being careful not to break them into smaller pieces, then glue them together. Oh, the audacity of this guy to demand $120 for what belongs in the garbage!
Maxine On Sale
Unlike the other items on this list, this washing machine was sold at a fair price after only being used for a year in this household. It looked functional, and anyone who wanted to check it out could drop by the house. So what was the issue?
What an odd name. But hey, we have heard countless people referring to their cars by worse names. So, this shouldn’t have been any different until we realized that this English folk was trying to sell us her washing machine. Get it?
No Exchange, Sorry
And this is why we prefer not to buy things on the internet. Usually, the buyer only hands you a box containing the item, and you aren’t given enough time to check it, much less wear it. This person ought to have done a prior outfit check.
It is definitely too late for him to ask for a refund now. There was no way the seller was going to return the money. If there is anything this list should teach you, it’s that you should really be careful about online shopping.
Almost Had Us
This person might have been banking on selling his couch for twice its price, given its antique quality. It’s made from genuine animal hide, imported from the deserts of Africa. And he’s only selling it for £200! Is that a bargain deal or what?
At least, that’s how we imagine the rest of the ad went. However, on closer inspection, you will see that it’s just synthetic leather that has cracked. This worn-out sofa’s worth is nowhere near £200! We would argue that it’s better off being disposed of than being sold!
“Hokay Hohn Me Weeey”
It’s hard to believe that there are people who don’t know the proper spelling of the words washing machine. After reading this advert, it felt as if someone had laundered the letters of the alphabet, and this guy only managed to spell those words out with what few letters he could get.
Woshing masheen? Who knew that with a change in spelling, we would be able to adopt an accent too? Never mind that completely functional washing machine. These kinds of adverts from the Brits are truly the stuff of comedians’ dreams!
Low-key Not Selling
We can tell that these two aren’t going to be together for a long time. Wonder how we know? This man is low-key selling his girlfriend on the internet. But he claims he’s not and is only taking a moment to thank the sales page where he found her.
Bought from someone else? This awfully sounds like a page that’s a black market for selling women. Was she not up to par, or was she just past the warranty period? Whatever the reason, we are still glad that the page led to more love in the world.
Anonymous Model
Without meaning to, this newbie seller made a joke out of her advert. She posted a picture of a lovely new pale pink pastel jacket that still had its tags on. She said that it had never been worn…well, at least, not until now.
She made the mistake of having this model wear it with a bag over her head. We get that not everyone wants their face on social media, but this was just too hilarious! But to be fair, the jacket looks way better worn by someone than hung on a rack.
Perfect Condition
There are pros and cons to having pets in the house. They’re great company for when you live alone, and they make a good alternative to playmates if you have kids. But if you don’t train them, they might end up making a chew toy out of your furniture.
This is just too sad to see! Frankly, the recliner itself looks quite comfortable. We can’t imagine how painful it must have been for the owner to find the first bite mark. Given how obvious the damage is, describing it as perfect was just pushing it.
Let’s Not Get Ahead of Ourselves
Sometimes, sellers will make you rush into buying a product. This especially happens when they market their items as collectibles or limited editions of a pop figure. But it only works if it actually resembles the famed celebrity. Anything else is an obvious sham!
It may look like it, but we’re sure that isn’t the English singer/songwriter who achieved unparalleled success. It pays to be sure about what celebrity you are marketing before selling things like this on the internet. Otherwise, you just look like a clown.
Explains Everything
It often goes unstated, but it’s perhaps the most critical part of becoming a seller; you’ve got to have a stellar reputation. A big part of that is tied to choosing the right brand, quality, and design for the items you’ll be selling. Don’t believe us? Look at this woman below.
We wouldn’t have thought anything of her, but after reading that and seeing the information she had posted, it made us think that her hubby left for good reason. The moral of the story? Learn to keep your work life separate from your personal life.
Those Mystery Boxes
Here is one fail-safe tip when buying things. Never buy those mystery boxes, no matter how cheap they are. Most sellers only put low-quality items or, worse, garbage inside. They basically repackage random things for a quick buck. Look at this case, for example.
We have to give him some credit! Those are sweets! But you would be better off buying a pack of each for less. We bet this seller even ate some of the extra goodies before repackaging bourbon biscuits in this box!
Choose One
A lot of netizens were confused after seeing Tasha Burt’s odd post. She had been a long-time member of the group, offering helpful item suggestions to buyers and sometimes helping sellers find prospective buyers. So, after posting this, everyone couldn’t help but ask: What the heck?
Usually, when people have us choose between two things, they’re usually more or less in the same category. What does she need either of these for? It seems no amount of time will help her make up her mind. Did she want more space to sleep on or a mini-human?
Luxury Kids’ Cakes
You might have all the money in the world, but there’s no undoing the mistake of buying this set of cakes for your kid’s birthday. This woman prides herself on baking luxury kids’ cakes, but the thing is, it looks like kids would do a better job at it!
Know what the ingredients are? Four cups of flour, icing, and a cup of disillusionment. It makes for the perfect birthday cake meant to give children nightmares if you ask us. If you mistakenly order one, be prepared to eat it alone.
Be Like Rob
When you grow older, you learn to spend your money more wisely. You don’t overspend it on going to clubs or watching movies in the theater. If you decide to move out, be wise and buy yourself quality kitchen appliances to cook with like this guy.
Not only has he heavily invested in these breakfast gadgets, but he knows his priorities. How about helping him gain some cash so he can apply for the renewal of his passport? Also, you could always ask him to make you fresh toast with the merchandise as you come to pick it up!
With His Bag of Coal
Christmas is nearing. And Andy Marsden knows it’s the perfect time for him to market his services. He knows he can draw. It’s just that we wish he had put in more hours of practice honing his skills. He’s almost got it!
Here is a fun little fact. Every Christmas, St. Nick stops by his house to bring him a bag of gifts. Guess what he brought last time. A lump of coals with which he uses to draw these doggo portraits!
Fits Your Backyard?
We don’t understand why some customers dislike AliExpress. It’s so easy to find the perfect product in this online retail service. While we were looking for something to fiddle with, we came across this item! All that’s left to worry about is delivery.
You can choose to have this item delivered to your backyard after a month, or you can choose to piece it together yourself. But the biggest problem has to be where to fix it. Either way, we’re sure everyone in the neighborhood will love this attraction!
Didn’t Wonder
Now that we’ve gotten older, we’re staying up late, but it’s not because we want to. That’s when our brain is most active, overthinking about what our workmates said, questioning if we locked the door, and what “Harry Potter” would look like if he had teeth for glasses!
It’s not really the most flattering look for the beloved character. But we are certain this would have scared away “Voldemort” just as efficiently as the scar on his forehead. He doesn’t need to master the spells anymore with this fail-safe defense.
Sure, We’ll Do It For You
Jamie posted this advert weeks ago, but until now, there haven’t been any takers. So, she asked us for help. We said we’d take a look at it and then tell her what was wrong with it. We think she needs to learn a thing or two about customer support.
Jamie, you really shouldn’t pass the burden of taking this bed apart and then piecing it back together to prospective buyers. And if it isn’t too much to ask, take a picture of the bed without your stuff on it. It’s that simple.
Glaring
Just how many good ideas can one person have in a lifetime? According to Krzysztof, not too many! This guy decided to re-sell Pepsi Colas in cans. Since he’s only trying his hand at it, he decided to make money off his first sale and use it to buy more of the stuff.
Really, who would want to buy a lone Pepsi-Cola stocked at room temperature? What’s even worse is that the suggested retail price is displayed over the top of the can! This guy is lucky that he even got a like and two comments. This should be reported!
Scary Pixie Doll
You guys are in luck! We have come across a limited edition pixie doll sold at a reasonable price. It has been kept in mint condition, and here’s a picture of it out of the box so you can inspect it more closely. How about placing an order?
We know that’s a no, right? We have a piece of advice for whoever was selling this pixie doll, though. Throw away the book of spells and keep it buried where it belongs! The last thing we need is to bring a childhood nightmare back to life.
Must Talk To It
Even without personally knowing this seller, we know that this product is legit. Wanna know how? He’s selling an (outdated) condescending tumble dryer. He says it only works when it wants to, but given that it’s English, we aren’t surprised.
The guy has tried everything. He has kicked the tumble dryer, slammed his fist unto it, and out of desperation, pleaded with it. With the right tone of voice, maybe you can hear the tumble of laundered clothing inside it.
Looks Familiar
A.J. Assar swears by an honest living. But that can only get you so far. Lately, he has come up with another life plan. He has decided to try his hand at sales, and his first product is this display stand, complete with a console, TV, and controllers.
People who saw this thought it looked too familiar. The fact that he was selling the retail stand made people question whether he had stolen it. As such, we really wonder if anyone overlooked this highly suspicious ad and went on with the sale anyway.
A Plushie!
Here’s one advantage of buying an item online. After an advert is posted, people can quickly judge whether the item is legit or not. All you need to do is browse through the comment section and see if the seller is telling the truth.
This seller had been a bit hasty in posting the photo, and unfortunately, the platform didn’t allow him to delete it. So, they resorted to telling one lie after another to potential buyers saying that it was only a plushie standing in the background and, later on, that it was a neighbor’s cat!
The Transporter
Some people simply have a natural knack for comedy. Without even trying, this guy managed to reap more than a dozen lol reactions and reshares and finally secured himself a buyer. What was the popular item, you wonder? A spotted transporter.
Yeah, it does look like Statham. Whoever created this paper mache did a great job making a modern-day sphinx using the actor’s head. This would have been doubly effective at guarding the souls in the afterlife and keeping people from looting the pyramid!
Drawn Into Life
These are the few people who actually do have rad drawing skills. This guy only uses a pen, markers, and paper to professionally draw dog portraits. The only drawback is that he has an obvious dislike for cats. Won’t draw them!
Is it just us, or did this guy manage to draw that dog into life? He captured that forced smile to a tee, and we can’t help but want to book an appointment to have a portrait of our furball done too. He says it should only take 30 minutes tops!
Definitely Him
Imagine hanging this on your living room wall and then watching everyone do a double-take at it. Is that…and you nod your head; yep, it is! They cover their mouths. It looks like the spitting image of John Lennon! They even remembered to add his whiskers!
We can’t imagine any person living in this day and age not knowing what John Lennon looks like. That’s not even close, with that blonde, frizzy hair and a circular face. We really pity whoever was conned into buying this tacky piece.